Saturday, April 23, 2011

Apart Yet Not Afar

Well, it has happened at last - I have come home from college. You remember how homesick I was when I first started this blog? How this whole thing kept me sane because I could commit my feelings to someone elses' eyes, albeit unseen? Well, now I'm doing the same thing again - but longing for a different home.

The move home has been hard, but as a result I've discovered something that I probably should have put together years ago. I think I knew it for a lot of that time, but I never really articulated fully, even to myself.

You know the old phrase "Home is where the heart is," right? It's about that saying that I wish to write today. However, I would make an addition. Consider it like one of those old logic problems: "Caius is a man, men are mortal, therefore Caius is mortal." Well, here's my spin off of Caius. "Home is where the heart is, the heart is with loved ones, therefore the home is with loved ones."

Does that make sense?

I've been with my parents and siblings in our beautiful mountain valley home, sitting by a fire and drinking wassail and watching a movie or reading books from Dad's library. I've also been with them in a room in the Holiday Inn on the edge of town, with next to no belongings and no house to go to. I've even seen them out in the wilderness, when all of us were living in a tent, wearing torn jeans and old sweatshirts and smelling like sweat and campfire smoke. But no matter where we were, I was happy - because I loved them anyway.

I have been with my fondest friends in the comfort of our apartments, laughing and enjoying good food (usually courtesy of Adrianne) and listenening to Brittany or Adrianne singing or Katie playing heavenly strains on the harp. I have also been with them when we were all makeup-less and wearing pajama bottoms in the middle of the day, hoping that none of the young men from the ward would choose that moment to call on us. I have seen them in snow and rainstorms, on campus and off, and while hiking up temple hill in the middle of January. But no matter where we were, I was happy - because they were with me.

Whether it be my friends, my kin, my parents, my brothers, my sister - it won't matter where we are. If they are with me, I am home.

And once you have made your home with someone, and bound up your heart so closely with theirs, something happens. No matter where you go, even when you are alone, there is a part of them that will be with you. It is as it is written in a poem my Grandma Pullan shared with me:

"Go thou thy way and I'll go mine
Apart yet not afar
Only a thin veil hangs between
the pathways where we are.
'For God keeps watch 'tween thee and me'
So never fear.
One arm round thee and one round me
will keep us near."

See? Isn't that an amazing blessing? Those that we love, though apart from us, are never far away. This even goes for those who have parted from this mortal world. I know that God keeps watch between me and my great grandparents who have passed on to their next habitation, just as he does between me and my fond ones who have parted from each other until next fall. And better still is the blessed promise that one day we will no longer be kept apart, but will be reunited before the Lord.

"I know not where thy road my lead
nor the way of mine
but coming to the judgement seat my soul shall meet with thine.
'And God keeps watch 'tween thee and me'
I'll whisper there.
He blesseth thee, he blesseth me,
and we are near."

'Til next time my friends - and may He always keep watch over thee and me.   

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